November 20th rapidly approaches, riding towards us like the Headless Horseman.

You know what that means…

Time’s almost up to submit to the Fall Writing Contest!

Unsure about submitting something? let me ease your mind…

Let’s rewind for a sec…

I may be hosting this year’s writing contest, but this isn’t the start of my Company-writing-contest-journey.

Firstly, I joined the summer contest of 2023. I wrote 90% of my story on the last day submissions were open. I tried printing out the story so I could do a quick edit before submitting, but I was at my friend’s house and it took me ages to connect to the printer (I have a bad track record with printers). I did finish it, though. And I submitted it on time, a few hours to spare.

I didn’t expect to win. It was a horror piece about McDonalds. But winning wasn’t my goal. I just wanted to finish something.

If you think my track record with printers is bad, just look how often I finish projects. Before I joined The Company, I never finished anything. Projects would sit half-done on my computer, just waiting for inspiration to hit me over the head again.

But a flash-fiction piece? Low word count, with the incentive of fortune and glory? That was motivation enough for me to get those fingers tap-tapping away.

But again, it wasn’t about the prizes. It was about starting something, and not stopping until that something was finished.

Unsurprisingly, I did not place. But I didn’t care–I had written a story, start to finish.

Ego the living planet.

Flash forward to the spring. It was before I moved to Ohio. It was, however, after I’d been accepted to The Company.

I was like: hey, what a perfect time to flex my writer muscles! I’ll actually try to write a good story this time, and impress all the apprentices with my mad skills (I’m paraphrasing).

Oh boy. Little did I know that I was setting myself up for failure.

That story took me ages to write. I spent weeks on it, and I hated practically every second of it. I cried to my mom about it, complained to my cousin about it (since she was in town). I certainly banged my head on my desk about it.

But I can’t quit, I thought. I need to show them that I can do this!

“Them” being the apprentices, of course. How awkward for the them, since the apprentices certainly had no clue this battle was going on.

But I was set. I needed to prove my worth.

Which was so silly. I’d already been accepted into school. I shouldn’t have needed the students to think I was cool. But there I was: heart on my sleeve, ego out of control, and feelings on the line.

Through the groaning, complaining, and loathing of the entire process, I managed to finish a story. And at the time, I didn’t hate it. I submitted it. Thought, “surely, I’ll win this. And if not, I’ll get an honorable mention.”

…

Nooope. Nope. Once again, I didn’t place. And I was mad.

Mad at myself. I should’ve done better. I should’ve chosen an easier premise. I should’ve, I should’ve, I should’ve…

Woah. I had to take a step back and realize how unhealthy my mindset had been. I couldn’t tangle my worth up in a fun little writing contest. That wasn’t a sustainable way of going about life.

So I spun things around. “You finished another story, Lucy,” I thought. “Even with family in town, and going to work, and hating everything–you still finished it.”

So I celebrated that!

Now, I’m not saying that you should have a mental breakdown and then go “hey, at least it was worth it.”

And I can hear you saying “Lucy, is this really how you’re trying to convince me to join your writing contest? By telling me how much you hated it?”

Yes and no.

Listen. We can put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be good at stuff. Sometimes that motivates us to push through and get thigns done. But sometimes that just kills the fun of it. Kills the process. Kills the love!

I don’t want you to kill anything.

It should be fun.

You should totally join the Fall Writing Contest. It will be a blast, and the prizes are pretty great! There will be details below…

But you don’t need to tangle up your worth in whether you win or lose.

You can just write a story, and then take a step back and say, “well, would you look at that! I finished something!

You can write to win. You can start writing with a prize in mind.

But you can also just start to finish.